Grade This! - Feb. 18, 2005
Grade This! Is a weekly graded evaluation of events and achievements in politics, culture, arts, etc. Got something to grade? Submit your pieces to editor@campusprogress.org by noon every Thursday.
HotMilitaryStud in White House Press Corps Uncovered
Over the past week or two Jeff Gannon( J.D. Guckert), a White House press corps member, known for lobbing softball questions to President Bush and Scott McClellan, was exposed for some interesting improprieties by sharp investigative bloggers at Daily Kos. Congresswoman Slaughter of New York has called for an investigation into how Gannon received press credentials when he "has phony or questionable journalistic credentials, is known for plagiarizing much of the ‘news’ he reports, and according to several web reports, may have ties to the promotion of the prostitution of military personnel." Interestingly enough, even though Gannon has written numerous articles slamming gays he owns the rights to the several titillating websites including Hotmilitarystud.com, Militaryescorts.com, and Militaryescortsm4m.com
Daily Kos Bloggers: A+, Irony: A, White House Propaganda Machine: D+
Ben J. Blaiszik, University of Illinois – Chicago
Walmart Loves Unions, Eh?
The big box retailer, Walmart announced last week that it would close a store in Jonquiere, Quebec after union negotiations went sour. Walmart said the union’s demands would have made the store unprofitable, apparently union negotiators were asking for a few too many loonies. Employees of the Canadian store insisted their demands were fair and Walmart just didn’t want to deal with the union. In 1999, the store became the first Walmart in North America to unionize, a second quickly sprouted and a major campaign was launched in Canada to unionize Walmart employees. The United States didn’t make it quite as far as the Canadians. In 2000, meatpackers at a Texas store voted to organize. The response? Walmart decided to eliminate meatpacking jobs all together. At least they didn’t blame Canada.
Walmart: F, Canada: A, Canadian workers: A+
Marcus Mrowka, George Washington University
Media Whoring
Look, no one becomes a journalist to live the high life. I have seen two freelancers come to blows over the last free chicken wing at a press junket. So when, within the timeframe of only a few weeks, three conservative journalists – Armstrong Williams, Maggie Gallagher, and Mike McManus – were all revealed to have taken thousands of dollars of taxpayers money to promote No Child Left Behind and the president’s anti-gay marriage initiative, I damn near lost my cookies. Journalists are not public relations firms that are up for sale. It should make us queasy to live in an America where the administration and the fourth estate are in bed together. Recently, Conde Nast instituted a strict “no freebies” policy so that magazines like Vogue don’t compromise their coverage of anti-wrinkle creams and wedge sandals. When a glossy fashion rag has higher ethical standards than some of the most prominent conservative journalists, you know we have a problem.
Williams: F Gallagher: F McManus: F Chicken Wings: A+
Elana Berkowitz, Campus Progress
Bush’s Budget
Announcing an "austere" budget, President Bush claimed he was cutting wasteful, ineffective programs. Translation: no more help for the working poor. Of course, the White House’s denouncement of "ineffective" programs only goes so far—Abstinence-only education is getting a line-item increase of $39 million. And that’s only a week after a comprehensive study in the Bush’s home state of Texas showed such curricula were correlated with an increase in teen sexual activity. On the bright side, he does cut the agribusiness subsidies that have funded the demolition of the family farm. However, as congressional Republicans have already promised to keep these subsidies intact, such budget planks don’t mean much at all.
Bush’s Budget: D+
Kevin Collins, University of Pennsylvania
Virginia is for Lovers – but not for underwear
My fellow D.A.R.E. graduates will surely stand with me and applaud anyone who can say no to crack. However, this cheer stops short of Virginia’s lawmakers and their fashion crusade against visible boxers, briefs, thongs, and low riding pants. Recently, the House passed a bill written by Algie T. Howell (D) that will impose a fine of 50 dollars on anyone who wears pants that expose underwear in an offensive manner. Kudos to Lionell Spruill (D) for reminding the House to think about the fashion crimes of lore- "shell suits, Afros, and platform shoes." The plumbers of Virginia need not worry, yet – the bill must still pass the state senate.
Virginia’s law: F. Their tourism Motto: A +. Howell: F. Spruill: C – only because some of us still dig the ‘fros.
Elizabeth Sexton, Northwestern Missouri State University
Not Forgetting Poland
The Bush Administration’s $80 billion request for funds to cover expenses in Iraq and Afghanistan includes $400 million to pay for our allies in the “coalition of the billing.” $100 million of that money is headed for Poland, which is soon expected to reduce its deployment in Iraq to about 1700 troops. That works out to about $60,000 per Polish soldier in Iraq. Message to American soldiers? If you want to get more money from the US Government, become a contractor or join a foreign army.
Poland: A. Paying Poland $100 Million: D.
Matt Singer, University of Montana
Canseco, Baseball and the Wonder Drugs
Jose Canseco’s book called Juiced: Wild Times, Rampant ‘Roids, Smash Hits and How Baseball Got Big just hit bookstores and it alleges that baseball is full of steroid users. Baseball for the past 15-20 years has become more and more of an embarrassment for sports lovers. Canseco says that some of the great stars like Mark McGuire, Rafael Palmeiro, and Barry Bonds have all used steroids and I must say, I believe him. I no longer watch baseball unless the Cubs make it to the playoffs and I still think that the league should just get rid of the entire lot of them and start all over. For now, football and hockey are the sports I trust and love.
Baseball: F, Football: A+, Hockey: B
Nick Urcuioli, Purdue
A Young Spud Named Darth Tater Killed Your Father
In an effort to bring an age appropriate Star Wars action figure to the tot market, Hasbro has taken the lovable Mr. Potatohead to the dark side and created Darth Tater – the very picture of goofy malevolence. Now preschoolers can discover for themselves that the evil lurking beneath Vader’s hood is nothing more than a potato-face, often completely barren of features. It’s all good fun, but there is something uncouth about the demonically rotund Tater pulling his light saber out of a compartment in his rear end where he also keeps his eyes, ears, lips, and nose.
Mr. Potatohead’s Amazing Transformation: A
Darth Tater’s Fear Factor: C+
Emily Hawkins, Campus Progress
The UN, the US, and Sudan
On January 31, the United Nations released a long-awaited report denying the apparent genocide in Sudan. While the report should be commended for its thoroughness, including its naming of particular persons and officials guilty of crimes against humanity and war crimes, this means that states aren’t obligated under the UN Genocide Convention to take action against the atrocities occurring there. The report strongly suggests referring the case to the International Criminal Court, which will only happen if the Security Council approves such a move. That is unlikely, of course, since the United States has a ceaseless fear of the ICC and would never vote for anything legitimizing the court.
UN Report: B-
US response to the atrocities in Sudan: D-
Collin Sullivan, University of Nebraska
47 th Annual Grammy Awards: Britney Spears wins her 1st Grammy Award in 7 attempts—Bill Clinton wins a second.
After more failed nomination attempts than Steve Forbes and Alan Keyes combined, Britney Spears has finally broken her losing streak. She bagged her first Grammy Award this week at the 47 th Annual Grammy Awards in Los Angeles, California for her single ‘Toxic’ off her album In the Zone. It was her seventh nomination in 4 years. Sounds like Britney needs some lessons from former President Bill Clinton. In a blaze of two-term’in glory, he walked away with his second consecutive Grammy in two years in the spoken word category for the audio book version of “My Life.”
47 th Annual Grammy Awards: B (for losing the ratings battle to Desperate Housewives)
Bill Clinton: A+ (What can we say? The guy is on fire!)
Britney Spears: C- (Note to the DNC: Keep her off the ticket in ’20)
J. Christopher LaTondresse, Bethel University
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